How the Baby came to be (the other version)

Gosh, I felt all kinds of pressure for this as a few of you said you couldn’t wait. I restrained myself a little as I try to keep this a PG blog, hope you’re not too disappointed.

 

Once upon a time Mama and Mummy met and fell in love.

They got married and after a while the Mummy thought something was missing.

To make a baby you need sperm from a man and an egg from a woman. Mummy and Mama couldn’t make a baby by themselves. Mummy lamented not having a penis. Mama was quite relieved Mummy didn’t have a penis.

Happily they found a nice sperm bank which wanted to make lots of money and help people have families. The sperm bank sent them some sperm all the way from Europe.  After many frantic emails and phone calls by the Mama it was delivered, still frozen.

Mummy and Mama went to see another doctor in Thailand. The Mama was poked and prodded and injected. She actually became blasé about having a male, relative stranger’s hands inside her vagina. Mama and Mummy emptied out their bank account and gave it to the doctor. That doctor took the sperm from the donor and an egg from Mama and put them together. The sperm and egg joined and began to change into an embryo which would later become a baby.

The doctor then took the embryo and put it inside Mama’s uterus. There it began to change and grow into a baby.

Mama’s tummy, boobs,face, arms and butt grew really big while the baby grew inside her for 9 months. She tried to eat healthily but wound up living on mostly cheese and cake. When he was ready he came tearing out of Mama’s vagina and the 9 pound, very round headed Baby was born.

You can read the baby friendly version of this story here 😉

Ever wondered how different it might be raising a baby in Thailand? Head over to The Mommy Rundown where I’m guest posting today and find out.

*****************Come be my friend!******************

Help me get over my high school unpopularity issues. 

Subscribe or be my friend on twitter or facebook  or pinterest 🙂

<img